I’m starting this blog series in an attempt to find my way to “chill” because yo gorl has almost no chill – only now instead of that being a personality trait it’s causing hormonal fluctuations that my body doesn’t know how to process anymore which then leads to me passing out … which is no bueno. I consider myself agnostic because I’m not sure there is/are a god/s, but I’m not going to tell you they can’t possibly exist either. I do however enjoy the idea of trying out different forms of meditation to see if any of them will work for me, which brings me to my latest adventure – using tarot cards as a point of focus for meditation. Let’s see what cards I pull today, shall we?
Twenty Four – Faith
As I draw my card today I ask how to conjure some motivation today since I’m very much still apathetic. I made a to-do list yesterday of things I both want and need to do, but now it feels somewhat like pulling teeth trying to do those things — not because they’re bad things to be doing. I guess in a way my answer today is rather obvious. I believed I could do these things last night when I was setting myself some realistic goals, and now I need to trust my past self that I can do them today even though it feels like I can’t. As my therapist has said, “Sometimes you have to just do the things to get through the melancholy; just make sure your goals are realistic so you don’t set yourself up for a fall.” I knew I could do those things last night. Everything mechanically is functional, so I should be able to do them. Now I just have to put one foot in front of the other until I get there. Sometimes focusing on the direct task of the moment rather than the total tasks that are needed for the end product feels much more attainable.
This card was pulled from Ravynne Phelan’s Dreams of Gaia Tarot set.